 |
|
Understanding Thai Hospitality March 2000
|
Many years ago, a British gentleman name Andy came to Thailand for a holiday. He stayed with a Thai family of a close friend. Things went very well. The family took good care of him. In fact, the hospitality shown was beyond the British standard and it sometimes annoyed him. One night, before he went to bed, he sat down casually playing the piano in the living room. The head of family saw him and approached Andy and asked, "Would you like to have coffee, tea or a cup of milk?" Andy politely declined the offer - "Oh don't worry, I am fine. I do not want any drink. Thank you." About five minutes later, there was a cup of English tea served by the maid. Andy did not say anything, and he did not drink that tea at all since his habit was not to have any drink before bed. The Thai gentleman was a little bit disappointed because he perceived Andy's action as declining his hospitality. Andy was also a little bit annoyed because he perceived that the Thai gentleman did not understand his English. But behind the scenes was another story. When Andy said that he was fine and that he did not want anything, the Thai gentleman understood Andy's English perfectly. But in our culture, when we analyze this scenario, Andy might have felt KRENG-JAI the host even though Andy might not have wanted a drink. This is because many times, when a Thai says "Never mind, don't worry", it's the way we say YES indirectly. Secondly, the Thais have a motto - "When serving food to monk, don't ask". In our Buddhist society, every morning the monks will walk to people's homes. People will do the TAK-BART - the act of kindness by offering food to monks. Thais always say not to ask the monk "TAK BART YAR TAM PRA", which means when offering the food to the monk, do not ask what food he likes or prefers. This is because as a monk, they cannot be selective in what they eat (or to have pleasure in eating). Whatever is edible and offered is the monk's responsibility to take whether he likes it or not because Buddha has taught that as a monk they should not have temptations. With this insight, Thais will use their discretion on whether it is appropriate to offer the food or help. Therefore, in Andy's case, we can see that our over-hospitable nature may create some misunderstanding. Next time, if a Thai offers you something without you asking, don't be surprised!
Kriengsak Niratpattanasai
|
|
| ...from Kriengsak Niratappanasai's Thailand Tales |
|
|
 |
| Kriengsak Niratpattanasai Thai Danu Bank Bangkok Thailand |
| Kriengsak was one of the Asian Business Strategy & Street Intelligence Ezine's earliest columnists and continues to provide some of the most savvy advice on the Net on working in Thailand. His down to earth advice from years of working with falang and locals mixed with local folkstories continues to delight and inform. Click on Kriengsak's picture to learn more about our great friend and colleague. |
 | Thailand Tales Index -
About Kriengsak -
Other Columnists |
asia's only dedicated daily ezine for the asian business, management, strategy & marketing professional
research articles news independent columnists business strategy market & street intelligence
© Kriengsak Niratpattanasai and the Asia Pacific Management Forum 2000